House Guests

In laws 

It's kind of funny that, at my age, I'm still having adulty firsts. But, after almost 2 years in Juneau, we had our first house guests: Soldier's parents. I knew it was going to be a little overwhelming for me; his family is all very animated, opinionated, and extroverted and I am very much not. But it turns out I might also just be a terrible hostess. 

When I go to visit and stay at someone's house, one of my biggest priorities is to not interrupt their life. I don't want to be a burden or a pain and I want it to be as fun and easy as possible. I kind of assumed that everyone was like this. That is not the case. To be fair, we did have some fun, and some of the things that bothered me probably should have: 
We made a trip to Costco and the in-laws bought enough food for a month, which meant my fridge was full to the brim, which gave me anxiety every time I opened it. Mom in law has just about every health issue known to man, but none of them seem to be entirely managed. This meant that going anywhere was a production and a large bag of food and various supplies and forms of entertainment always had to go along. 

But the biggest thing that bothered me is mom in law would randomly clean things, mostly in the kitchen. I know, you now think I'm insane (if you didn't already). But here's the thing: many (most?) people would love to have a maid and a lot find a way to do it. I am not one of those people. I don't want someone who doesn't live with me to be going through my things, someone who doesn't know how I like things done or where things go. Does that make me weird or a control freak? Eh, maybe. And logically I know it shouldn't bother me because she just wants to help (I think), but it made me feel like she was trying to take over my home. It's like she wants to help but instead of asking what will be helpful, she just starts doing whatever and it stresses me out. Alright, I'll admit I might be a little crazy. I really tried to not let them know how much anxiety it was giving me, but I'm not sure I was successful. 

And of course, now that they're gone, I feel guilty about not enjoying their visit more and not being more gracious. I also feel bad because I don't think I'm ever going to be close to Soldier's family. But on the other hand, maybe I just don't like people staying in my little apartment. My parents are coming to visit in a week, so I guess we'll find out.